Friday, March 2, 2007

EE Decrees

In the liberal fascist totalitarian state of Earnest English, the following will be banned:
  1. Spam that purports to be from an anonymous work colleague sick of hearing others remark about your weight and advocating yet another unhealthy and catastrophic dieting scam. Even when recognizing immediately that this email is spam, the paranoid among us start to wonder what people are saying about the thirty pounds that have taken up residence on our thighs since we started dissertating.
  2. Spam addressed to people waiting to hear back about possible job offers with subject lines saying "EMPLOYMENT OFFER" are strictly outlawed, verboten, nicht, nyet, lo, NO! Anyone caught sending this kind of email will be responsible for the addressee's ensuing panic attack, not to mention damages for emotional distress when they realize the email is NOT a job offer.

2 comments:

medieval woman said...

Hee, hee - I totally agree - especially with the last one. Your heart kind of skips a beat, huh?

When did Adventure U say they would be making the next set of decisions (which I assume would be a campus visit)??

Earnest English said...

Hi Med Wom! They said they'd be making a decision "in the next couple of weeks," which frankly could mean anything and is the reason why I'm not so hopeful. I don't know -- it just didn't seem to end on a good note as if I'd be hearing from them again.