I'm so behind. SO behind. I still haven't gotten things back on track since Tot and I were sick. Then last week I had one of those funk days where I got a number of good things done, but I didn't make great headway on the things that are really behind. I'm just hanging on until this is all over, so I can focus for a while on an old (creative) project that I'm all excited about again. But first I have to slog my way through to the end, starting with catching up on things I'm having a hard enough time getting myself to do already.
Now, this morning Tot is sneezing and sniffling. And I've already had a minor freak out. This is not a great way to start out the week!
My emotions were also running high yesterday. I hate apologizing for being a bitch. But I certainly was. I'm pretty sure it's that I'm excited about this new-again project, but I have no time to work on it. My home life is almost completely Tot-care. Tot is not the kind of kid who can be held on my lap while I work. In fact, if the laptop is out, he wants to plunk on it. If we're not paying enough attention to him, he starts running around the house screaming. So I can't get work done here, whether teaching, scholarly, creative -- you name it. The only thing I can do is cook, and then only if Absurdist Lover watches him. The trouble is we both have our agendas for the day and have to compromise. I was definitely not a good compromiser this weekend. In fact, I pretty much sucked at being a decent adult, at least yesterday. But I did make a pretty fabulous zucchini bread, my first. Not that zucchini bread makes anything okay, but it certainly makes for a nicer breakfast.
Now, I'm going to pull myself together and try to be a calm mom and academic with a big supply of humor. Is anything so bad that it's really worth freaking out about? This is just the natural absurdity of our lives. If I just look at it right, I know it's super-funny.
Everyone: have a great week full of focus, self-knowledge and -control, and lovely things going right!
3 comments:
I totally understand about the computer. Yo can't do a single other thing if the "beteetah" is open. We literally can't open it when we're home with him unless we want to commit to showing him videos. That's why my Droid has become a life-saver.
Yeah, I can't get much work done at home with the kids around. I really need a daycare situation, but I hate having all my money go to it. Boo...This is why I never sleep. All the work has to be done when the kids are in bed, or it doesn't really happen.
Luckily we have an open kitchen so I can cook without Little T under my feet about half the time - I put the kitchen gate up and watch her play with her toys in the living room just a few feet away. But I don't get any work done when it is just the two of us. I felt guilty asking Mr. T to come home early last week so I could get some stuff done but then I got over it. Part-time day school has helped tremendously! Not that helps with the kids are sick. She loves school and it gives me time to get things done and not feel guilty when I go to bed at a decent time instead of staying up late to work every single night. I am always behind but that seems like life.
"have a great week full of focus, self-knowledge and -control, and lovely things going right" <---
YOU TOO!
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